What Are Friends For?

friendship quote shakespeare

Good friends are hard to come by.
Old friends are the best friends.
Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the others old.

There are a reason why clichés become clichés, because they are universally true. I’ve always chosen to have a small tight group of girlfriends that know me in and out over a large array of friends. I feel fortunate to have 4 life long best friends, 2 from high school, Kay and Ashley, and two from college, Laura and Jeanette.

This weekend I hosted a sleepover for three of them. Weekends with girlfriends always make me feel rejuvenated, happy, and young at heart. I absolutely believe those studies that show that people live healthier lives and overcome illnesses quicker when they have strong friendships throughout life.

winery

Only one lives in the same city as me. The others are in Philly and DC and we all take turns visiting each others cities. Although we’ve all changed and in some ways grown apart, we all have the common base of our friendship to hold us together. If we met in present day, we probably wouldn’t choose each other to be friends. But really, how many people meet friends in their adulthood that compare to the friends they meet or harvest in their college years?

Like any relationship, friendships take effort – especially when we all live so far apart. (Do you know how hard it is to pick a weekend that suits four busy young women?) But, old friends are the ones to invest in because no one can replace the lifetime of shared experiences.

old friends quote ralph waldo emerson

 We met in high school and college, an intense time where we have the freedom to experiment with our identity. A carefree time that leaves room for spontaneity, creativity, and simple fun. There wasn’t the harsh competition or comparison that we may do with friends that we meet in our adulthood. Studies shows that you are happiest when reminiscing over old memories – and that’s one of the things old friends do best – retelling the same funny stories, bringing up inside jokes, and remembering the “good old days”.

When I’m with my friends it’s always a judgement free zone. We love one another like family, accepting us, flaws and all, and validating us as a person that matters. Friendships play a vital role in our lives. They fulfill our need to connect, to bond, to belong.

Although we’ve all grown up and changed, we still compliment each other so well. We can go weeks with out communicating but when we’re together it’s like no time has passed and we quickly revert back to our college years with big belly laughs, silly stories, and boy talk. But the best part is that we also accept one another as the women that we have grown into and eagerly celebrate our lives with each other.

xoxo Katie

 

  • Love this so much!

    • kwalshmac

      thank you!

  • I agree – one of the best things is rehashing old jokes and memories with friends! It’s so fun! Guaranteed giggles.

    • kwalshmac

      Yes, we NEVER get tired of telling the same stories over and over again. Love it!

  • Pat (Mom)

    I’m so glad that you found good friends to share your life. I agree that some of my happiest times are with my oldest and dearest friends. This line that you wrote in your blog is so very true:
    “No one can replace the lifetime of shared experiences.” That applies to my friends and my family, and maybe most importantly, my husband of 40 years.

  • Old friends really are the best friends! Two of my best friends have been my friends since kindergarten and I’m so lucky to still have them in my life. You’re right that it does take effort when you all live different places, but it’s totally worth it. I love how when you get together each time it feels as though you haven’t been apart and you pick up right where you left off. Spending time with the girls is the best! I’m so glad that you had a great weekend with your friends!

    • kwalshmac

      oh wow, that’s so amazing that you have friends since Kindergarten! My oldest is from seventh grade. You can’t replace all the boding that took place during your formative years – no one else “gets you” like they do. (or knows all your dirty secrets! )

  • Rachel G

    That’s awesome that you’ve managed to maintain these friendships for so long!

    • kwalshmac

      Old friends turn into family – you put in the effort but at the same time can effortlessly get along and grow with each other

  • I love having friends like that! My sister is in college right now, and when I told her that I only talk to some of my college friends once a month or so, she thought that was so sad. But when you can pick up where you left off and talk for over an hour and be the same person you always have been with them, what’s so sad about having friends you could count on to be there if you needed them? 🙂 We still love talking about things that happened in college too, the crazier the story the better!

    • kwalshmac

      Yes, those old stories never ever get old! And it’s true – there’s great comfort in knowing that these friends will always be there, even if you go months with out seeing each other. I can imagine what your sister is thinking – if someone told me my beloved roommate, who I was attached at the hip with, and I would only see other quarterly I wouldn’t believe we’d still be as close as sisters.